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Fanon Review: The House of Angkara by Omashu Rocks

MibuWolf October 8, 2012 User blog:MibuWolf

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FRSimage
This review was conducted by the Fanon Review Squad and reflects our best judgment of writing and fanon authorship quality. Please don't take offense if the review wasn't positive. We always give advice!

MibuWolf here for another review. I'd like to say that I actually had this review on time despite the late posting. My computer was fudging up, and so I read Angkara on my lovely Windows Phone and then typed the review... on my dad's manuel typewriter.

Anyway, I was really excited about reading The House of Angkara by Omashu Rocks after being so pleasantly surprised by his other fanon I reviewed last. But... I don't know how to sugar coat this: Angkara was a real let-down for how good Political Animals was. And I'm going to tell you why.

Writing Categories

  • Mistakes/Grammar: 7.3 There were a lot of typos and grammatical mistakes. Lots of end punctuation mistakes, which is one of my ultimate pet peeves (i.e. having a period instead of a question mark). Then, there were some grammar mistakes and overall errors that just made the writing seem as if it were hastily done. I don't know if it was, but that was how the mistakes made it come off.
  • General Writing: 7.9 The writing style was pretty repetitive, with lots of sentences just starting with pronouns, and though the descriptions seem really fancy with some excellent vocabulary, they all were--in their essence--the same in structure. Like I said, though, I adore OR's vocabulary here.

Writing Score: 7.6... C

Content Categories

  • Story: 9.3 I like the story, though. It's engaging, thoughtful, original, everything I like in a fanon.
  • Characters/Character Development: 8.2 I was not a fan of the characters here. Most of them seemed like stereotypical examples of a certain personality, and I didn't really get too much depth to any of them, besides what seems forced by the character type. Though OR does do a good job of having a balanced cast, and even if the individual characters aren't wonderful, they come together as a whole very nicely.
  • Genre (Advent... Action): 9.5 As I mentioned in a review a little while ago, I review the genre I find most prevalent. I love, love, love OR's action writing. It's simple, and too the point, but not too underdescriptive that the scene doesn't make sense. Kudos, bro.

Content Score: 9.0... A-

Content Quality Categories

  • Creativity: 9.0 I can't say I've ever seen this sort of a premise for a fanon. I like the mixture of the slightly overused rebel setting with the political undertone, it provides an extremely intriguing fanon which I look forward to seeing continue. My only complaint, however, is that a lot of the development and premise are a bit stereotypical/not entirely creative. For example, when Shen was dropped off I was kinda thinking Harry Potter and expecting Ohk to see a half-giant riding away on a flying motorcycle.
  • Believability: 7.2 ... I thought that a lot of the fanon was too rushed. A lot of the progressing of events weren't very realistic, as it seemed to kind of tumble forward rather than develop in a way that makes sense. I was going to have this for a deduction of the story, but I felt that wasn't fair since so much else of the story was awesome. Further, I thought that some of the dialogue was kinda sketchy and not entirely believable, but that goes more into my problems with the characters.

Content Quality Score: 8.1

Overall Score: 8.2... B-

My advice for OmashuRocks: Get an editor, friend. That's my biggest advice. There were a lot of stupid typos, such as the end punctuation slips (of which there were quite a few), and that is what I think editors are for: picking up the tiny typos so you don't have to read through carefully (I hope my editor doesn't see this, haha). Then, I'd just say pull back a bit. I know you were planning this for a while, and from experience from having planned something I'm writing for a while, it's really hard to not rush forwards. But trust me, if you take about twice as long as you'd think you should to get from point A to point B, your fanon will seem a lot more thoughtful and a lot less hasty.

What sort of person would enjoy The House of Angkara? Anyone who is interested in a decent read, or someone looking for what I foresee as a long commitment to a fanon ^_^

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