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Fanon Review: Suki's Story by Agent Slash

MibuWolf December 4, 2012 User blog:MibuWolf
This review was conducted by the Fanon Review Squad and reflects our best judgment of writing and fanon authorship quality. Please don't take offense if the review wasn't positive. We always give advice!

MibuWolf signing on this fine Monday evening. So I took the SAT on Saturday (which, fun fact, also spells UR SAT day) and that's why I got behind on my review--anytime where I had enough time to sit down that I would have spent reading, I spent studying. But now it's done and I have time! Yay!

Today's review is a completed fanon, Suki's Story by Agent Slash. It follows Suki on... adventures. Ummm... I really hate to say this in a review Slash will probably read, but Suki irritates the heck out of me, still irritates the heck out of me, and will probably always irritate the heck out of me. I could go on, but I'm choosing not to. I just felt that it was necessary to point out my bias before continuing.

Writing Categories

  • Mistakes/Grammar: 9.0 I noticed very few fatal typos, and overall the point deductions mostly stemmed from awkwardness, but awkwardness in sketchy sentence structure rather than writing style. Overall very good, though. I was pleasantly surprised at the attention to detail in editing.
  • General Writing: 7.7 The writing seemed a bit dry, for lack of a better word. There weren't any descriptions that really resonated with me, no real insight in the writing. Plus, it was usually quite clear when there was an action scene: the paragraph was about three times as long as the longest non-action paragraph. It seemed like there just could have been a lot more to it, but there just wasn't. If that makes sense.

Writing Score: 8.4... B

Content Categories

  • Story: 7.5 I was never particularly engrossed in the story. There were large portions where I found myself losing focus, however I think that this could be easily fixed with the writing. Though it's not the most creative storyline I've ever heard, it's a nice concept, and I think that a lot could have happened with it. But it just kind of didn't. I don't want to sound mean, but I felt like it was just the same thing over and over again that developed a bit and kind of died off.
  • Characters/Character Development: 7.8 While the character development was decent, they mostly seemed pretty cookie-cutter, and none of them particularly spoke to me personally.
  • Genre (Action): 8.7 The fact that there's pretty consistent action is nice. Plus, I love how clear it was that Slash did his research into the fighting styles and such. As a tessenjutsu fan (see what I did there?) myself, I really appreciated his insight that he uses actual moves! It's one of my ultimate pet peeves when people have a character with a fan or a katana and it's clear that they don't know their stuff by messed up physics and impossible moves. Honestly, this fact largely outweighed my issues with the writing and other such descriptions of action scenes (for which I had similar issues as the general writing).

Content Score: 8.0... B-

Content Quality Categories

  • Creativity: 7.2 Honestly, I didn't think it was that creative. Characters aside, following a Gaang character in outside adventures seems rather cliche, as do a group of power-hungry people trying to take over the world, et cetera et cetera.
  • Believability: 7.5 And... I didn't find it all that believable. I don't have much to say here, but there were a decent amount of "no-way" moments, including largely the premise, at least for me.

Content Quality Score: 7.4... C

Overall Score: 7.9... C+

My advice for Agent Slash: Well, for future fanons, I think that you should try and branch out a bit more with your writing. It felt too controlled to me. You've improved a lot--I know that's always an irksome thing to hear--but it's true. The more you write, the more you'll improve. My biggest advice is to stop being really aware of what you're writing. That's what editing is for. For practice, write with almost extravagant details, to a level where you think your superfluous detail is in horrendous abundance, and then look over what you did, what word choice you used, how you organized your sentences, how you described the scene, characters, et cetera, and then pick out things you like and take out things that didn't work. It's good practice and I think you might be surprised at how much more you see in your writing. Other than that, I'd say try to branch out with your characters a bit more, too. I feel like most of your problems now that you've improved your general writing is just from being too safe--go crazy!

What sort of person would enjoy Suki's Story? Suki fans (see what I did there? This pun never gets old) obviously, but I think that this fanon might also speak to action fans (heheheh) as well as appreciators of developments of canonical characters.

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