Hey there,here, reviewing by on behalf of the Fanon Review Squad.
Five Years after the end of the war a new age of peace has arisen. However, after being framed for a hideous crime, Aang becomes the most wanted man in the world. Working with friends, old and new, a new Team Avatar must work together to uncover the truth of this mysterious "Order" and resolve their own insecurities at the risk of losing everything.
This fanon sounds, at first glance, to be a slightly cool and creative one, what with the Avatar on the run for committing a crime and all. However, that illusion shatters when one begins to read. I am sorry to say that the writing is clunky and jumbled, the characters are one-dimensional, and the plot itself is wholly unsatisfying to read.
Story – 6.0: The premise seems interesting enough, but the execution is honestly poor. It is marred mainly by the elements mentioned above, which I will detail in later categories.
Action – 7.2: The action scenes are not actually too bad; they could use some variation in descriptive language, though, as well as a coherent narrative.
Writing – 4.0: Not only is it relatively basic, but it also runs together, making it hard to actually comprehend what is going on.
Creativity – 7.0: This story is actually quite creative in the plot summary, but the fanon doesn’t quite meet its own potential. On another note, it is the first Toph/Aang pairing I’ve read, so that’s new.
Believability – 2.0: The idea that everyone would suddenly believe Aang was a murderer simply because of the cause of death is a little far-fetched, especially since they didn’t even take the time to hear his side of the story. Katara’s reaction was especially disappointing. More on that in a moment. Otherwise, the inclusion of certain swear words felt forced coming from characters we know and love, especially some of the heavier words.
Character Development – 2.5: I feel like most of my issues here stem from the fact that characters that grew with Aang for the entire series suddenly turn tail and hate him without taking the time to understand what happened. Katara, as I mentioned before, is guilty of this from the beginning, and I firmly believe that this random change of heart was built in specifically to allow for the Taang moments to happen. Let it never be said that I score a fanon low for the shipping, but it has to be done believably, otherwise it just detracts from the story.
Average Score: 4.8
Note: All scores are out of ten
Advice for Nunouno1: Get an editor or two to fix up your story (though it would help if you posted the actual chapters to the wiki instead of Fanfiction.net), and make sure that you make all of your characters and their interactions believable. The shipping is fine; just make it something believable.
Who should read Order to Disorder? Anyone interested in a Toph/Aang pairing should give this one a go.