Hey there,here, reviewing by on behalf of the Fanon Review Squad.
The story follows the journey of Erica who is the newest Phoenix. The Phoenix is a girl who is able to master two of the four elements: fire then another in the order of Air, Earth, and then Water. It is the Phoenix duty to keep the Avatar in check and ensure he or she doesn't lose control and try and take over the world. However since there is no Avatar, Erica must choose what she will do with her life.
Legend of the Phoenix is certainly an interesting take on the lore of the Avatar world, and it is fairly well-written. However, I feel that continuity and canon errors, along with convenient plot devices, leave this fanon with a sort of hollow feel to it.
Story – 8.0: A bender who can bend two of the four elements is intriguing, but there is little to no explanation as to the retcon that takes place.
Action – 8.4: Action is fairly well-described, but it suffers from occasional repetitiveness.
Writing – 7.8: As far as spelling and grammar go, Saphira has a good grasp of how it works. Unfortunately, most of problems here stem from clunky structuring.
Creativity – 9.0: This fanon is very original; I will say that much.
Believability – 6.0: This plot, for whatever reason, doesn’t sit well with me. Maybe it’s the fact that the main character’s story is tied in with a major character in A:TLA and yet there is no explanation given as to how that works. It just is that way. In addition, many plot elements and conversations have a lot of convenience; things happen in just the right way too much for it to be believable.
Character Development – 6.0: I love the interaction between Natsu and Erica; their moments with each other are some of the best in the fanon. However, the rest of the characters, for example Palik, Tokuda, and Hazma are all rather two-dimensional at best.
Average Score: 7.5
Note: All scores are out of ten
Advice for Saphira1001: I like the concept, as well as Natsu and Erica’s interactions, but I would suggest that you develop every one of your characters. That alone would boost your fanon’s potential immensely. You might also want to explain (for canon sticklers like me) how certain events and people coincide in a believable manner.
Who should read Avatar: The Legend of the Phoenix? Anyone looking for a new and interesting take on Avatar mythos should read this one.