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Hello and welcome to the second edition of Parody Style. The only blog series that gives you a biweekly dose of wholesome fun and vitamin EPIC. Plus, you don't have to eat a bran muffin when consuming. Now without delay, A:ES.
Parody A:ES: Avatar: Every Soap
A few years have past since the hundred year war ended. Aang, Katara, and the rest of them had decided to visit the Fire Lord, Zuko.
"Hey Zuko, are you home?" Aang yelled as he jumped of Appa.
"No!" Zuko yelled. The doors opened and they saw Zuko standing there, in a bath robe no less.
"Hey Fire Lord, nice robe," Sokka taunted and Suki gave him a nudge. Mai then walked out with a stiletto in her hands.
"Alright, if you're assassins, I don't care. Just don't take off Zuko's-" she saw the Gaang, "Oh it's you guys... forgot you were coming."
"What were you talking about, assassins?" Katara asked.
"Oh yeah, me and the Avatar went and met them. They said something about wanting to kill us, but now he's dead so it doesn't matter," Zuko announced.
"I seriously doubt that, but who cares. It's not like being indecisive will hurt us later," Aang admitted, "Besides me and Katara are getting married anyways."
"What?" Sokka screamed.
"Never mind, we can wait another chapter for an explanation."
Toph spoke up "Did you guys forget about me? I'm blind, not invisible."
"Sorry," Aang said, "Anything you'd like to add
"What's a Yuo Dao?"
"I don't know, but it sounds like a fast food chain," Sokka joked.
"Going to the North Pole," Aang hummed as he crossed the border. He landed his bison and went to see Yue. Arnook let him do this, but reminded him to keep reminding her he did not like sushi.
"Hey Sokka's ex-girlfriend," Aang said as he stared at a fish.
"Aang, your greetings are not the least bit funny," Yue said angered by his lack of sensitivity.
"Listen, I need to give people airbending and teach them the ways of my culture. Any ideas how?"
"Why don't you just give random people airbending. I'm sure that won't back fire," she said in sarcasm.
"Great idea! Any other things I need to know?"
Five Minutes of Training Later
"I'm ready for the Saiyans, King Kai," Aang said proudly.
"What is it with him [kuzon] and that show. Remember to only use it with," Aang left before she could finish.
Aang stopped and yelled back, "You made me late for my wedding."
"Aren't you a little young..."
"Aren't you a little over the moon for Sokka," Aang joked.
"You will face my wrath!!!" the moon spirit said in a distorted voice as Aang left.
Mai walked around the Fire Nation Palace. It was boring, bleak, and blah, and she loved it. All of the sudden, an assassin appeared out of nowhere.
"What the -hog monkey- are you doing here?" Mai yelled.
"Giving inspiration..." the assassin whispered.
"Just go to the -North Pole-," Mai said.
"What are those lines for... The ones when we say words like -butt-," the assassin asked.
Mai shrugged "I don't know. We really are saying those words. Maybe kuzon is just trying to make a joke."
"Right..." the assassin said. Mai walked up to him and he stabbed himself.
"What is it with all you freezing assassins; to you guys want to die like that?" she ripped out the knife and put in her stiletto. "That looks better."
"Honey, make me a sandmitch," Zuko yelled down the hall. He saw the dead person. "Who's your friend?"
"You're dreaming, dear. Go back to your bed."
"Okay. Just watch the baby."
Mai looked at him, "What baby?"
"The one the stork just brought. I named it Nei Nei," Zuko said happily.
"Honey, did you drink cactus juice again? I thought we agreed that it wasn't good for you."
"I. Am. Fire. Lord. Zukoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo."
"Yeah, and I'm the Earth Queen," Mai replied.
Now I could to the next couple chapters, but they have nothing funny. I'll give you the gist of it. People have babies. Zuko turns toe-blonde. Air Nomads get rebuilt and Azula is back, psyche.
"All right, let's rally the troops, Mom," Zhao Jr. said.
"I still don't know why you want me to cos-play as Azula, but alright," said the wife of Zhao. She walked out on to the ship and gave a speech. "Let's go kick my brother's rotten butt."
"Short and sweet," Zhao Jr. replied.
The army got into boats and went to the Fire Nation capital. They had a giant dragon come with them, in case they got bored. It was named Barney. People liked Barney and they soon began to sing songs about him.
Barney is funny
Barney is nice
Let's go get some chile and ice
With a great big fire and a scream from them because of us
Fire Lord Zuko will go nuts
In another sea, the air nomads mugged a bunch of pirates. Pit even killed one with any-flex-nation. He was scorned for this and sat on a bison.
Fire Lord Zuko had prepared the troops for war, but he did not know how long they'd last. It was sad to see so may people allow the Barney to return. Did they not know his power? That was went through Zuko's mind. That's why Mai mostly ruled the country.
Else where at a completely different location, Iroh is on a boat with Aang's son.
"Are you sure you want these beans and broccoli?" Tenzin asked.
"Lay 'em on me. I'm old and need the strength," Iroh said plainly.
"Won't they give you gas?"
"Funny thing, gas comes in to forms. Positive and negative. One comes out the back and the other from the top," Iroh said senile-y.
"How did you become so wise?" Tenzin asked.
"It's the beans and listening to FNPR."
"Really?" Tenzin asked curiously.
"No it's watching Happy Days and Andy Griffith reruns. I do not know; I'm old and can not remember."
"Hey look, it's Barney," Tenzin shouted.
"I will make him eat fist!" Iroh yelled as he gulped down the plate in one bite.
"What do you have against Barney?" Tenzin asked curiously.
"He's my step-father. Wait no, that's Betty White. I'll remember it later."
Tenzin looked at Iroh, "You come from a weird family."
"Hey, we're rich and royal. Now, let's go kick Barney's tail end!" Iroh yelled as he attempted to jump out the port hole. He got stuck and Tenzin had to try and push him out. When that failed, Iroh farted while yelling, "Negative!" and flew out the port hole and toward his nemesis.
When he landed next to the
dinasaur dragon, Iroh said, "So we meet again." Barney cocked his head and roared at him. Iroh responded, "You know very well what you did. You killed my father. Wait, no that was Ursa. I never did get around to calling her." Barney roared back at that.
As Iroh argued with the titan, Tenzin took a skiff, by himself, out to the 2 arguing giant. He did not like to see to things argue like that, and Barney's words were very hurtful.
"You sing with that mouth?" Iroh yelled at Barney's roaring comments. Finally, Tenzin brought the boat around.
"Anything I can do to help?" the boy asked as he stared down the behemoth.
"Pull my finger and pat my back, in tat order."
"Is that like patting your tummy and rubbing your head?"
"No just to as I say, young one." Reluctantly, the monk did just that and Iroh laughed, "Negative," as he flew into the air on a flautlence that made tidal waves. "Positive," he said as burped the beast to the bottom of the sea. But he fell head first into the water.
Tenzin searched the water for the reinstated general. The water was still churning after the negative blast. He finally found the general.
"Hey, kid Iroh," said as he began to sink.
Tenzin grabbed his arm, "Here I'll help you up onto my skimmer."
"I'll never let go of you."
"No seriously, let go I'm weighing your boat down," Iroh explained.
"I can't, Nei Nei would-" Tenzin was interrupted by his phone ringing. It was Nei Nei. He quickly dropped the old man and started talking, "What up, girl."
"Oh no, the Phoenix Army is approaching," Katara yelled.
"Don't worry, I need your help though," Aang asked politely.
"Okay." They did the motions of the super powerful energybending move and destroyed the Phoenix Army. However, when they finished, Katara slowly turned into a penguin.
"No, Katara!" Aang yelled.
Pengtara replied, "Quack."
"I can not have a penguin for a wife," Aang told his step-brother.
"I don't know; you could-"
"She's a penguin Sokka an actual penguin," Suki explained.
"MY SISTER'S A PENGUIN!!! I WILL USE YOUR INARDS AND STUFF 'EM FULL OF SEAL JERKY AND FEED IT TO THE TRIBE!!!" Sokka yelled as he grabbed his boomerang.
"You kept your boomerang," Suki said to her husband.
"Yeah, it's crafted of-he escaped!"
"Hey Dad, can I play with a snowman?" Sokka's son asked.
"No, wait; put arrow on its head and let me come out there and play with you," Sokka said nicely. His son did as he was told and made a great, big arrow out of yellow snow.
"That's good son."
Sokka grabbed his club and mashed the snowman to pieces.
"You broke him," his son cried.
"Only one thing to do, go to the Cave of Ancients," Suki said.
"Where did that come from, honey?"
"Yue, why didn't you tell me that it would turn people into penguins?" Aang asked coldly.
"Because you teased me about Sokka. I turn into the moon and your wife turns into a penguin. Wow, all spirit related incidents happen to loved one."
"Can I fix her?"
"Not unless you ask Dora Kong, the Avatar who loved her monkey."
"Where is she?"
"In the Cave of Paintings," Yue said politely.
"But be warned-" Aang left before she finished again.
"Being a moon spirit stinks! I mean, my only friend is a fish, that keeps eyeballing me."
"Moo," said the fish.
"This exactly what I'm talking about."
Tenzin walked to the palace of the Fire Nation. He was shocked when he saw the wide scaled destruction of the palace. He searched and saw no remains. The only thing he saw was a tent in the distance.
"Hello?" he called. A figure emerged from the tent. It was Nei Nei and she was blonde, toe-head blonde.
"Hey Tenzy," Nei Nei said to her interest.
"Why are you blonde?"
"Incident with peroxide and Yue. Anyways, have you seen my arm."
"Oh my spirits! You've turned dumb like your dad."
"Dumb? You think my father is dumb!"
"No, not like that he just isn't... With it."
"Of all the things. I think you aren't with it! I mean look at you; you're bald, short, foul-smelling. Why do I even like you?"
"You like me?" Tenzin said gleefully.
"Not anymore!" she yelled, and with that he left crest fallen.
"Yue said that I had to take you to a cave; I think that's where my parents are now."
"Let us go then."
After a minor world war that brought everyone together, the Gaang goes to the Cave of Ancients. However they don't realize that their new friend has been brainwashed and is an energybender/Joo Dee.
"Hey, is the entrance to the penguin changer up ahead?" Aang asked the brainwashed girl.
"Yes, but you'll never get to it," she replied.
"Oh quack!" Katara spoke in penguin.
Suddenly, the Dai Li, Kid Icarus, and Long Feng who's now in his 80's.
"Your a bad guy!" Toph yelled.
"Wait, why didn't you sense she was a bad guy when she lied sometime?" Tenzin ask.
"I don't know."
"Get 'em!" Sokka exclaimed.
A long tiring battle ensued Aang lost his bending and Katara turned back to normal. In a last attack, the traitors eyes turned purple.
"Oh my cow! She's entered the Necara state," Aang yelled to Sokka.
"How can you tell?"
"Her eyes are purple, Sokka. That makes her an energybender," Aang explained.
"Suki's eyes are purple," Sokka noticed.
Glances from all sides came toward Suki. Finally she spoke up, "So what?" Aang and Suki used a real "spirit bomb" and blew away the army. And everyone lived happily ever after.
is one, if not the best fanon of our time. He created an ending at first, but then an alternate timeline that changes the way we think about fanons and spawned many references of itself in other fanons. So that's all for this edition, and remember: Never look a dead horse in the eye. Also if you want to have a favorite fanon parodied, post a comment down below.
Hope yo liked this chapter. :D