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Hello, this is BlackMonkey, signing in to review Avatar: The Flaming Stone by .
In this series, the 100 year war has ended, yet Earth King Kuei has failed to return to Ba Sing Se and has no heirs. As a result, the capital of the Earth Kingdom is shifted to Omashu with Bumi as the Earth King. He and Firelord Zuko attempt establish a healthy, trustworthy, and peaceful relationship between their two nations, but not every citizen is satisfied. Rebellious firebenders form the Ozai Movement, dedicated to overthrowing Zuko, mysterious Watebenders arise, a past Avatar returns, and spirits battle for good and wrong. All of this is due to one ancient piece of jewelry, a necklace called The Flaming Stone.
I had known about this fanon for a while but never had known it's potential. Okay, it wasn't great, but it did just fine and kept me reading, which most new fanons like this don't. It could use some help, I'll say that, but even without it I feel like some scenes of this story were better written and had more suspense than the greatest ones on the wiki. It was pretty good.
- Story - 8.9: The beginning starts out
kind ofvery slow, but once you get into the real story everything shapes up. It could use a big plot twist or two.
- Action - 9.0: While there is lots of action that keeps you reading and wanting to see what happens, battles and fights aren't very well written. Even so, the suspense left at the end of each chapter makes it very good.
- Writing - 7.5: There's nothing much more to say, other than some parts really weren't very well written, mostly in the first half of the story.
- Creativity - 8.5: It's an "After-The-War" fanon - Need I say more? (Although the necklace and Vezkor the Volcano part was very intriguing.)
- Believability - 7.7: Despite lots of effort, the old characters personalities aren't very well displayed, and some cliche Toph and Sokka jokes are overused or just used in places where they don't fit.
- Character Development - 6.9: In case you did not notice, this is the first time I am adding a Character Development section to my reviews. I've realized it's a bog part of story, and am sorry to say that this fanon's characters really didn't struggle and learn as much as they should have. The only relationship I really saw grow and develop was Torek and Ty Lee's, I thought that was handled well and evolved at a good rate.
Average Score: 8.1
Note: All scores are out of ten
Advice for Omashu Rocks: Don't get discouraged by the scores, first of all. That's what this part is for. Make sure you really get into description, and read each chapter over a couple times before you publish it. You have to be able to know what is happening and why everything is happening. Make sure that if a random user stumbles upon your fanon and reads a chapter they won't want to stop. That's what makes a story great. Another thing, try to make the old characters exactly how they were in A:TLA. Make sure all your characters are developing. Make sure they are struggling, seeing what each other are feeling. Make them learn.
What kind of users should read Avatar: The Flaming Stone? Anyone who wants to read an "After-the-War" fanon with really creative twists.
Next Review:in the Ba Sing Se Times