Fanon Review: The Lifebenders by BlackMonkey and Suzon - Acenglished!

Hey, fanon-folks. Today, I will present you a nice, another epic review of The Acenglished Review!

First off all, I’m sorry for some negative-like scores, but I know that you’re looking for advice. Don’t worry! I always show your advantages and the advice!

The Lifebenders is BlackMonkey and Suzon's Avatar fanon. It tells the story of an earthbending master named Toka. He is supposed to teach Avatar Yangchen how to Earthbend. However, he is extremely cocky and arrogant, so Lee decides to teach him a lesson. He destroys Toka's legs in hopes he will now realize he is not the best. Now, Toka has to adapt to being handicapped.

Editorial[]

Writing Style 8.7 (x2) – Once more I review one of BM’s masterpiece. As usual, you, BM, writes story in <br/> instead of the space that usually we do. In this case, I can’t say it’s a failure or something; it is unique. But unfortunately, The Lifebenders stays at one chapter, so I can’t give too high scores, because I can’t see the progression on the fanon.
General Writing 8.5 (x2) – The writing is respectable, but I didn’t see any “wow” at all.
Grammar 8.6 (x3) – I noticed not a perfect grammar but this is above average one. I can't give any good advice in here. BM and Suzon, you both have created a great fanon!

So, it is... 8.6 (B+)

Content[]

Storyline 7.9 (x2) – The main story is really interesting, but note: After two – three times re-read the chapter. I like the outline, really appealing for me. But however, for non-English speaker, with the massive, crowded words like that, it’s hard to read for me. However, I didn’t see any “Avatar earthbending master” has been told before, moreover Yangchen’s masters. Nice.
Character Development 8.2 (x3) – I can’t say one chapter could bring me to know how’s the character, but you have outdone yourselves, both of you. I can see a strong, deep, and solid development was made on the very first chapter, as the plot summary said that he will be a cocky person. I know this will be a legendary... If you continue this.
Genre 8.0 – (Adventure) Adventuring, thrilling, and interesting story for one chapter. I can't give higher score than this for one chapter. Only one is not enough for 9, but I see this is really worth it.

So, it is... 8.1 (B-)

Essence[]

Creativity 8.9 (x2) – BM and Suzon, you have succeed for creating a fanon in Avatar Wiki. I haven’t read any story with spin and twists like this, but even you haven’t continue this, I see the story in the future. Yangchen’s master idea also neat!
Believability 9.2 – Thus far, I can’t see any unbelievable things on the story. The place, background, and everything, all of them are sensible for me. The one, little thing that annoying me is Kuzon—a Fire Nation name. But no problem, you both are nicely done in here.
Engrossment 9.0 – The main page hooked me already, especially the cover art is really wonderful, haha. No. A bit. The crowded words, that’s make this not interesting to read for me. I always interested to know what's next. Continue this, BM! Suzon!
Best Scenes 8.0 – Action. The action wasn’t covered the story yet, for me, but I see it is in high value. I believe Toka will have a great fight in future.. Tokka... *If you know what I mean*

So, it is... 8.8 (B+)

Behind the Scene[]

Plot Development 8.7 – The plot twists from the summary really remarkable.
Organization 8.9 – BM and Suzon, you both created the main page well, with a clear, well-planned tables for the information and the such.

So, it is... 8.8 (B+)

Overall Scores... 8.6/10 ! (B+)

What are BM and Suzon’s advantages? Continue. This. I say, a way too creative. I didn’t see any fanon competes with this one. And the character development also strong in here.

What RuleroftheBisons97 could improves on? Writing come in first serve. I want to remind you both, to revise (re-arrange) the line spacing to make the words more divided. I noticed some of readers also noted you in this one, so let’s change the words.

So, if you say so, who will definitely enjoy to read The Lifebenders? Everyone who wants a change, not the classic-post war fanon or after Korra fanon will adore this fanon. And everybody who want to see a masterpiece about Yangchen’s story.

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