|More from Faith124||Adventure||G||Positive|
|Seven Letters (Part Two)|
Chapter 4, Part Two
It's finally out!~
Chapter 4- Seven Letters
As I fell deeper into this overwhelming grief, I fell further and further away from myself. How many days had passed since that night? I held no perception of time. My world had been reduced to this corner of Appa's saddle, where I lay not so uncommonly as he did. I no longer noticed or cared of the lives and events of Sokka and Toph. They were nothing more to me now than figures in the faint background of my universe.
What was left of myself? I had rotted away; both mentally and physically. The last time I moved I don't remember. The last time I ate, I don't remember. The pain in my stomach and in my joints were no where near the pain where my heart and soul used to be. Each breath I took in was a struggle. Every blink from the distant stare I maintained burned.
So what kept me here, in this realm of the living? I had no doubt that those seven letters were my ultimate escape. But there was something keeping me locked in my own personal hell, doomed for endless suffering. Every day I recognized, I confronted myself. The ghost of who I used to be haunted me. Was it she who dare entrap me?
It was difficult to follow a thought as I drifted in and out of consciousness. The pressure was changing in the air, and we descended. A storm was coming on, and fast. The dark clouds hung as heavily in the sky as my eyelids, and I again faded as thunder sounded in the distance.
Icy cold water beat steadily at my skin, forcing me into reality once again. There was ground beneath my feet, mucky and wet from the rain. I was surrounded by huge trees that somehow did not stop the water from drenching me. Where was I?
For hours I wandered deeper and deeper into the forest. I couldn't remember how I had got here, and I didn't know how to get back. But I knew all along why I had come.
I fell to my knees and allowed all the blocks I had kept up to come down. I tore the scab from my skin and bled freely into the roots of this damned forest. Tears ran free as my mind was filled with every memory of him I possessed. I found myself screaming out in agony and despair. If anything remained of who I used to be, it was gone now.
There was nothing left for me anymore. The ever-present light of a situation had long since been choked out. Is this as far as I'll ever come? Now I lay a curled, heaving pile of flesh and bones.
I brought a shaking hand to the hilt of a small hunting knife. It hovered a small distance from my face and I watched as a rain drop slid so gracefully down the blade.
As I gripped it's handle I wondered if it was this breath I drew in that would be my last. I held this last breath and used all the remaining strength I had to plunge the knife deeply into my chest. First came pain. Extraordinary pain. My tear-blurred vision brought me the final image of my bloodstained hands. Darkness covered me, and I exhaled. Then he was before me. I whispered the name that had gone unspoken for so long. His eyes opened, though they did not find mine. Now I called to him, but again his reaction was minimal. My hand found his face, and to my horror, he disappeared; leaving me nothing behind but a bloody hand print suspended in mid-air where his cheek used to be.
To Be Continued...
For the collective works of the author, go here.
|Death of the Avatar - In the Presence of My Father - To Walk Among the Dead - Seven Letters: (Part 1 ~ Part 2) - Insecurities|