|More from Vaznock||Comedy/Satire||PG - 13||Positive||None|
|Part 2: Kyoshi Revolts|
March 13, 2010
Clash of Worlds 2, Part 2: Kyoshi Revolts is the second chapter of the non-canon fanon crossover, Clash of Worlds 2. The story mainly revolves around the wacky, action-filled, and even bizarre interactions between the fanon characters from , Better World, , Guardian, and Wanted. The chapter was originally supposed to be written by both and , though Vaznock ended up being the sole author, while Waterkai chose to write a later part. Most of the event sin the chapter takes place in the world of Kyoshi Revolts, though a few take place in the worlds of Better World and The Phoenix Chronicles due to their respective association with Part 2 (Better World precedes it, The Phoenix Chronicles proceeds it).
The idea of a sequel to Clash of Worlds was a common discussion on IRC. Eventually, SuperFlash101 pitched a blog to the fanon community. The results were that four of the five users (minus Zukofan123) would return to do the sequel, while a new user, The Bos, would participate instead.
The chapter was released on March 13, 2010 as part of the first ever Kyoshi Revolts marathon.
As the world collides once more, chaos ensues. Ray and Lian challenge each other to a Waterbending duel that is to be attended by many fanon characters, the winner being named the Greatest Waterbender in the Universe. Meanwhile, Mitsuki realizes she must conquer the other four worlds in order to become Supreme Fire Lord, with the first being the world of Avatar Mian, while Azula has an affair with someone very unexpected.
Team Rebel Campsite (Kyoshi Revolts)
While, Mina, Kaila, and Chen are doing god knows what,and scurry through the mountains, trying to find a good amount of food.
"Ugh I hate this weather!!!!! I hate thiiis! How did this even happen. One moment we were all talking about this Lee Koisho guy, and then BOOM! Mitsuki conquers the Rebel City and we're forced out!! What a terrible conflict between plots!!!" Ray complains as she and Giu are forced to search through the area for a measly meal. "I mean, a day ago we used to be royalty! Now were just wondering through this shitty kingdom and!-"
"Okay, okay we get it, your PMSing! Just stop complaining! If you weren't so hot, I'd be making you bleed somewhere other than your va-" Giu was suddenly interrupted, however, by the appearance of two angry looking young adults, one male and one female.
"Who are you?" Ray asks as the two look at them sternly. The female one of the duo steps forward. Giu takes a quick look at her waving blond hair, her flawless peach colored skin, and her beautiful blue eyes.
"I am, Head Female of Black Lotuses." The woman tells Ray, with an obnoxious tone. "This is my assistant ." Giu reaches out to shake Gao's hand, though Gao simply looks at him in disgust.
"You have probably already heard of us. But don't fear, we are not hear to kill you." Lian says, while filing her nails.
"Why would we know you?" Ray asks.
"Didn't you hear me? I'm a famous assassin, a living legend, the best F*CKING Waterbender in the world." Lian replies.
Upon hearing Lian, Ray chuckles. "You may be good, but you're certainly not the best, sweety."
"Oh really, then who could possibly be better than me?" Lian says, deeply annoyed at Ray.
"Me. I am. You may think you're good, but I can feel water vibrations like a Badgermole feels earth vibrations." Ray says in a bragging tone.
"Why don't you guys settle this," said Giu. "The two of you can fight in a Waterbending competition. The winner will be the named the best Waterbender in the world. We can hold it in New Ozai!"
"Alright, let's go. And you should know, peasant, I can bend blood. One cut, one scrape, and your ass is finished!" Lian angrily yells. She and Gao then march away, while Ray watches her with menacing eyes.
"Geez, what's up her ass?" Giu says as Lian leaves in a rage.
Fire Nation Capital Palace (Kyoshi Revolts)
Princess Mitsuki holds a meeting with her friends, and . "As you know ladies, the entire world has been officially conquered by Fire Nation forces, not a speck of the planet is free anymore. We have won! And my prize, ohhhh my prize, will be Nero. One he sees my power, he'll be mine!!"
Suddenly, a messenger arrives. "Your Highness, the universe in great danger. Your mother has disappeared without a trace, and our very own world has combined with five other unusual worlds." the messenger begins. "And, as consequence for your mother's disappearance, I here by crown you Supreme Fire Lord Mitsuki!"
"Oh, and you have an answering machine message too. It's from your friend, Lian." The messenger says.
"I don't need her anymore!" Mitsuki shouts. "Now that I'm the Supreme Fire Lord, no one can stop me!!!"
"Wait." Quanlee buts in. "Since five other worlds have combined with ours, doesn't that mean Mitsuki would have to conquer all five other worlds as well?"
"You're right little lady! Give me that!" the messenger snatches the crown away from Mitsuki. "The one who receives this crown will be the one who conquers the whole combined world!"
"QUANLEE!!" Mitsuki yells. "Since you caused this, you and Tam Mee are going to HELP me!!"
"Yay!!!" Tam Mee shouts happily.
"First up, the world where Avatar Mian presides!" Mitsuki says with a deadly glare in her eyes.
Ba Sing Se Upper Ring (Better World)
"Honey, where you?" Azula shouts in a demanding and harsh tone.
"I'm right here baby." says Lee. As you remember, Lee Koisho and Nero split up. What Lee found was a 44 year old uber-bitch. That's Lee's kind of bitch, FYI.
"Ohhhh Lee, you're so rich and powerful. Tell me the story of when you defeated the Avatar, conquered Ba Sing Se, and had your bossdrowned at Ba Sing Se Bay." Azula says in an erotic tone.
"Well, me and the Avatar were engaged in a big battle. He begged for mercy, but I showed him none!! I killed him so well, that I became the leader of the Wind Killers, and my first order of business: Yino's death!!!" Lee shouts in a dramatic tone.
"Oh god yes, oh Lee, you're so evil and powerful, ohh yeah." Azula says in a satisfied tone.
New Ozai Outskirts (Kyoshi Revolts)
"I don't know if I can do this Giu. Lian, she, she's so powerful. She can bend BLOOD for spirits sake! I...I don't know if I can beat her. I'm just a stupid, dumb, deaf bitch." Ray tells her friend in a depressed monotone.
"Come Ray, Lian is just, just...a BITCH." Giu says. Suddenly, random fast paced music begins to play in the background. "In fact, I have a little song about her." Giu says, jumping in front of Ray.
Giu begins singing:
Weeelllll, Lian is a bitch! She's a big dumb bitch! She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world! She's a stupid bitch! If there ever was a bitch! She's a bitch to all the boys and girls!
Ray begins laughing, and Giu persists on signing.
Today she's a bitch, Tomorrow she's a bitch, Everyday, any day she's a bitch! Then on Sunday just to be different, She's a super queen kamehameha bi-atch!
Ray laughs hysterically, though she is terrified when she sees Lian and Gao standing right behind Giu.
Have you ever met my friend Lian, She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world! She's a mean dumb bitch, And she has no damn skills! She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! She's a stupid bitch! (Woo!) Lian is a bitch And she's such a dirty bitch!(Hey!)
Giu does not notice Ray's signals to stop, and he persists:
Have you ever met my friend Lian!? She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world! She's a mean dumb bitch, And she has no damn skills! She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! She's a stupid bitch! Lian is a bitch, And she's such a dirty bitch!
I reeeally mean it, that Lian... IS A BIG DUMB F*CKING BIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTCCCCCHHHHH!!!!
"Yeah!" Giu says as the song concludes. "Hey Ray, Ray? What'd you think of my song?" Ray can only stand in horror.
"I don't get it, what's the problem. So I may have got it from South Park. I mean, what's wrong with tha-" Giu suddenly turns around, and sees Lian staring at him with a deadly glare. "Oh.....oh god." Giu whispers.
New Ozai Hospital
"He's in a coma!!" shouts the medical doctors as they race to get Giu into the infirmary.
"Giu, buddy!" Ray shouts as he is carried away. "I promise I'll get that Lian back, if its the last thing I do!"
Ray looks on as Giu is carried away.
Phoenix Island Restaurant (The Phoenix Chronicles)
"Thanks for taking me out tonight Zura, I had a wonderful time." Amy says to the Firebender, lovingly.
"Me too, Ami." Zura says.
The two sit awkwardly for a few moments, but then, Ami leads in to kiss Zura. Their lips nearly touch, but then -
"I hereby claim this land in the name of Supreme Fire Lord Mitsuki!! Weeeeeeeeeeeee!" Tam Mee yells as she jumps in between Ami and Zura and onto their table.
"Hey what's your-" before Zura can finish, Tam Mee happily kicks a cup of hot tea into his face.
"Aaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!" Zura yells as he falls to the ground in pain.
"Who sent you, you crazy bitch?!" Ami yells.
"I did." Mitsuki says, coming out of the dark.
"Its you!? You're that crazy, pothead Princess from another world!" Ami realizes.
"Now I'm all clean, Air monkey!" Mitsuki yells. "And I order you to surrender your land, or face my wrath." Mitsuki says as Tam Mee and Quanlee immobilize behind her.
"MIAN!! TIA!! HELP?" Ami yells. Mian and Tia suddenly burst through the walls.
"What is it??!! Is it Jeong, Ravena, the Phoenix Warriors?" Mian questions.
"No, its that pothead girl, and she brought Paris Hilton with her!" Tia confirms.
"Even worse!" Mian says. "Come on, let's show that bitch that our world is ours, and no one else's!" The members of Team Strike take a fighting stance, and the battle begins.
Team Rebel Campsite
"Okay, Momo. Now I want you to put this gin into Lian's water bottle. And remember, make sure to replace it ALL with water. Make sure now a single drop of water is in the bottle." Ray tells the lemur. Momo picks up the gin bottle with his claws, and carries it away.
Meanwhile, Lian and Gao observe Ray from the bushes. "Okay, Gao, I want you to replace all Ray's water bottle content with this vodka. Make sure the water battle is nothing but alcohol." Lian says.
"Alright, whatever you say Lian." Gao says as he snatches Ray's water bottle and replaces its contents with vodka. Coinciding with this, Momo locates Lian's bottle, and replaces the contents with gin.
The referee then enters Ray's campsite as Gao flees. "Since Miss Ty Lee is absent, we will be holding the battle in the New Ozai stadium. The battle will take place in an hour. Remember, drink lots of water." he says.
"Don't worry, I will. Now why don't you go tell Lian do to the same." Ray says, slyly.
Ba Sing Se (Better World)
"Oh Lee," says an infatuated Azula, "tell me MORE!!!"
"Well I-" Lee begins to speak, though suddenly, another woman steps into the room. She appears unattractive and very fat.
"LEE!!?? WHO'S THIS??!" the woman says.
"Who are you?!" Azula says to her, bitterly.
"I'm Lee's WIFE! We married in the Spirit World." the woman yells.
"Why such a rich, powerful man marry a woman like you!" Azula asks in an angry tone. Lee begs his "wife" not to answer, though she does just that.
"LEE is NOT rich!! He's a poor peasant. For god sakes, he's DEAD!!" the woman yells. "That's the last time I marry a DEAD GUY!"
Upon hearing these words, Azula shrieks. "You're not rich, and you're dead?!! EWWW!!!!! NOW I REMEMBER YOU! You're that head thing that tried to get a job from me!? AAAHHHH!"
"Umm...heh heh. Come on ladies, there's plenty of Lee Koisho to go around." Lee says. Azula and his wife are not fazed. Azula creates a blue flame in her hands, while Lee's wife picks up an axe, and they walk toward Lee.
New Ozai Stadium (Kyoshi Revolts)
"Ladies and gentlemen are you ready to RUMBLE!!!" says the voice on the loudspeaker. The crowd begins chanting and cheering wildly. "In this corner, we have Former Rebel Adviser Ray. She may be deaf, but she ain't no Helen Keller when it comes to Waterbending! And in this corner, we have Lian, Head Female of the Black Lotus Assassin! She's blond, she's rich, yet she still can't get a date!" Among the members of the audience are, , , , Slythrin, , and a half-dead .
"Go Ray!! Kick her ass!" Kaila yells at the top of her lungs.
"Yeah Ray!!!" Mina shouts.
"Come on Lian, win this fight in the name of villains everywhere!" Jiang Rha chants.
"I hate you all." Slythrin says bluntly as everyone else, other than Chen, begin chanting.
Ray and Lian, both stumbling, take their last gulps from their bottles. The two of them stumble to the center of the arena, both of them intoxicated.
The referee proceeds to talk. "Now ladies, I want a good, clean-"
"F*ck you, you stupid monkey!" Ray yells as she tries to keep her balance.
"Hey don't talk to the Mr. referee....person like that." says an equally drunk Lian.
"Alright, Ready, Set, Bend!"
Ray and Lian both proceed to bend the water from their packs. However, they begin stumbling, and the water begins falling out. Ray attempts to create a whip, though she is unable to bend a drop.
"I'm gonna...beat...you" Ray says as she tries to move the water.
"Nooooo, I'm gonna....Ima kill you." Lian says as she begins swatting at the ground helplessly. Finally, Ray and Lian collapse to the floor and the crowd boos at the two drunken, knocked-out ladies.
"Hey, I'm okay!" yells Chen as he awakens and his wound suddenly disappears. "It's a mirac-"
"BOOOO!!!!!!" yells Jiang Rha, stepping upon Chen in the process, fatally injuring him once more.
Phoenix Island Restaurant (The Phoenix Chronicles)
Mian jumps up and tries to swat a swift current of air at Tam Mee. She jumps up onto the wall, and flips over to him. Mian tries to bury her in the earth, though she blocks his chi by surprise.
"Hey, bitch, you took away my bending!" Mian yells as he is unable to retaliate.
"Wow Mian, what a pathetic way to-" Tia is then pinned to the wall by Quanlee's daggers. "Damn." she remarks.
Zura shoots a large orange Fireball at Mitsuki. She counters it with her own, and both flames detonate. Ami attempts to knock Mitsuki down, though the Princess jets up into the air and begins and aerial assault. While in mid-air, she bends a current of lightning write at Ami and Zura, knocking them down.
"This world is now mine!" Mitsuki proclaims.
"Wow, it's too bad she's so hot." Zura says. "She's just such a bitch."
"Wait, you think she's hot?!" Ami says sternly.
"Ummmm...yeah." Zura says timidly.
"Well, we're gonna have to do something about that!" Ami says. She jumps back up.
"Looking for more, Air monkey?" Mitsuki asks, slyly.
Ami simply stares at her with rage in her eyes, and out of the clear blue, blasts Mitsuki, Tam Mee, and Quanlee of the building and all the way back to a whole different world.
"That'll teach those bitches!!" Ami says. She then walks over to Zura, and spontaneously kisses him.
"Daaaammnn." says a dazed Zura upon making such close contact with Ami.
"Ya got that right, hoe. " Ami says in a rather vicious tone.
"Remind me to NEVER piss Ami off," Mian says, while watching Ami. "Come back for seconds."
Ba Sing Se Palace (Better World)
Meanwhile, Lee's burned, lifeless body lies on the ground. Up on the very top of the Earth Kingdom palace lays his disembodied head. Out of the sky, Mitsuki, Tam Mee, and Quanlee land by his seemingly lifeless head. Suddenly, it begins taking.
"Hey, you ladies ever make love to a disembodied head before?" Lee asks flirtatiously. Disgusted, Mitsuki sets his head on fire.
"Hehe, screams of pain make me happy!" says a joyous Tam Mee as Lee's head is burned to a crisp.
New Ozai Stadium (Kyoshi Revolts)
"So, who won?" Gao says as Lian and Ray lie in a pool of vomit, talking gibberish.
"Ladies, that performance was...the worst I have ever seen. I have seen fetuses with better Waterbending skills than you." the referee says. "Neither of you are even close to receiving the title of Most Adequate Waterbender in the world. In fact, I hereby officially declare the two of you, the Worst Waterbenders in the Universe. I beg you not to ever Waterbend again, and may the Spirits have mercy on your pathetic souls."
"Awwwwwww." says both Ray and Lian as they lie face down on the ground.
Fire Nation Palace (Kyoshi Revolts)
Azula runs up over to the palace, though she is stopped by the guards.
"How dare you disallow me access!" Azula yells. "I am the Supreme Fire Lord!"
"Not anymore." says the guard.
"What?! Who could have taken my position!" Azula yells.
"Oh guards." says, stepping out of the palace.
"Wait, why is that old lady in my uniform?!" Azula yells.
"She's the new Supreme Fire Lord." the guards say. They then turn to Kama. "Your highness, we have an intruder!"
"Send her to the brig." Kama says.
"Lets go, woman." the guards say as they drag Azula away.
"Hey, let me go! I'm the Fire Lord, not her, MEE!" Azula yells as she is dragged away.
"Honey, who was that?"asks, stepping from the palace doors.
"It's just some senile lady.' Kama says. "Now come, tell me of the time when you defeated the entire Fire Nation with just your one finger."
Humor and Writing
When writing Part 2, Vaznock decided to give it the same taste that he gave in the original chapter, except with less outright, and even more implied humor. Many references to the original project were put into the chapter. These references include Mian referring to Mitsuki as that "pot-head Princess" due to her actions in the previous arrangement. Upon finally recognizing Lee's true identity, Azula remembers him as the disembodied head that jumped out at her while he was in her own world. Mian and Tia also recognize Tam Mee as "Paris Hilton" once again as they did in Part 3 of Clash of Worlds 1. Two other recurring humorous puns were made about Lee Koihso and Mitros' deaths, in which they both lie to Azula and Kama about how they won the battle in which their demises took place (Lee tells Azula that he killed both Aang and Yino; Mitros tells Kama that he defeated the whole Fire Nation with one finger).
Other incredibly non-canonical jokes are made, in which Ami beats up Mitsuki and kisses Zura, Azula is thrown from her position of Supreme Fire Lord and is replaced by Kama, and Chen is killed by Jiang Rha in an accidental way similar to the way Mitsuki and Lian accidentally kill Nero in the original chapter. Most of the characters are also portrayed in their normal traits, aside from Gao, who was portrayed as a calm, shy, kind person instead of the psychopathic human that his character truly is.
The biggest cultural reference to the chapter was the "Lian is a Bitch" song. The lyrics were modified from the famous South Park song "Kyle's Mom's a Bitch!" which is sung by Eric Cartman. The result of the song being sung aloud was the same for each character; each person sung about heard them singing and subsequently punished them. Vaznock also decided to give Kama a quick return, mainly due to her upsetting departure from the real series.
The chapter did have a few continuity problems. Due to the fact that it premiered after Mitsuki conquered the Rebel City, it had a different start than how it ended in Part 1. This was made fun of slightly in the beginning by Ray, who is flabbergasted that the setting changed from the Rebel City to New Ozai without any explanation.
For the collective works of the author, go here.
|Clash of Worlds Chapters|
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7
Participating Fanon- - - - - - - -